It’s becoming clear that no-one will shut up about Affleck’s wiener. Every column and blog is talking about it, every chat show host asks him about it, and now his wife Jennifer Garner is getting asked about it.
So what about Garner? Surely she’s a bit sick and jealous of people fluttering over her husband’s pipe every hour of the day?
To balance it out and keep things equal, here is a list of the Top 3 Sexy Jennifer Garner Scenes… (and yes that is Top 3, because she doesn’t do sexy scenes often)…
3. Catch and Release
Want to get your own back on Affleck, Jen? Show him this video of some guy kissing your face off in a steamy scene from a so-so romcom. Just turn it off before the scene gets a bit depressing.
Pretty much all of Alias (a TV show running from 2001-2006 where Garner plays a spy) has a bit of sexy-Garner in it. Maybe you could make Ben watch all 5 Seasons, Jen? Including the part where you seduce a businessman in black lingerie. And the part where you seduce a businessman in red lingerie. And the part…etc.
1. Catch Me If You Can
What better way to shut up Affleck, or any husband for that matter, than show him a video of you having sex with Leonardo DiCaprio (a.k.a The Uber Man). Especially after she seduces him (see above video). Jennifer, just take two minutes out of your husbands day and remind him who is boss. Then karate kick him to the floor like you do in Alias and walk out. Then walk back in and check he is alive.
That should do it.
Got any more ideas on how Jen can get revenge? Share your opinions @MovieMasticator